Whom Do You Love? Whom Do You Love?
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“Enigma” by Henri Jules Ferdinand Bellery–Desfontaine, 1898. Photo: The MET Museum (public domain)
Variety

Whom Do You Love?

Personality Test
Everything’s Gonna Be Alright
Reading
time 2 minutes

Take this personality quiz to discover with whom (or what) you are enamored.

You get drafted into the army—tomorrow you are to go to the front line. How do you react?

a) You fish a uniform out of the closet and parade in front of the mirror, making menacing or solemn faces. You look great!

b) You call the train station and book a spot on the platform for tomorrow’s farewell to your sweetheart; you hire a band to play romantic music in the background and arrange fans to ruffle your hair; you wait for the sun to set or the rain to fall.

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c) You mediate between the feuding states to prevent war.

Earth is attacked by a MegaRobot from another galaxy. What do you do?

b) You tear through the chaos of the city, steal a car, and flee with your beloved into the woods, where you come up with a cunning plan for defeating the MegaRobot. In protecting your love, you save the world.

a) You put on your cape and get ready for a showdown. The MegaRobot doesn’t stand a chance against you—a superhero.

c) You convince the MegaRobot that all is well, and that the universe will wrap both him and humanity in its warmth.

You’ve bought a juicer. What do you do?

c) You put it on the table and gaze at it adoringly.

b) You invite your loved one over for a delicious smoothie.

a) You make a healthy, nutritious smoothie and down it in one gulp.

You’ve been made an offer you can’t refuse. How do you react? 

a) You refuse it—no one is going to tell you what to do!

b) You discuss it with the love of your life and then decide.

c) You accept it and, in gratitude, pay the person who made the offer $100.

You are about to tie the knot with someone you love. What do you do?

a) You say, “Okay, only joking, see you later!” and leave.

c) You sincerely and profoundly say, “I do,” just as you did every other time you got married.

b) You sincerely and profoundly say, “I do.” 

If most of your answers are:

a) You are in love with yourself. And that’s fine—to love someone else you have to love yourself first. Unless you only love yourself until you die—then it’s a bit of a shame for the missed opportunities.

b) You are in love with another person. You also watch a lot of movies and TV series. If you watch them with the person you are in love with, then great. Remember, however, that it’s also good to sometimes get away from the screen and go for a walk or have dinner together.

c) You are in love with all aspects of life. Little birds and meteorites are drawn to you. Wonderful! Just be careful that the procession of existence doesn’t wring and squeeze you out like a sunburnt lemon. 

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When Adults Play Children When Adults Play Children
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Illustration by Marek Raczkowski
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When Adults Play Children

The Genius of Walt Disney
Paulina Wilk

It is time to shed the Mickey Mouse costume. Walt Disney’s cartoon fantasy holds the truth about the most important transaction of our times. Perfect childhood is fiction, powered by technology.

“Daddy, why didn’t you tell me you’re Walt Disney?” asked six-year-old Diane with dismay. She found out at school, when a friend told her that it was her dad who created Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and Goofy, the characters loved by all the kids across the nation. Diane and her younger sister Sharon lived a sheltered and very private life. Despite spending their afternoons playing in large studio warehouses, the girls treated them like a regular playground. They had no nannies and were not sent off to boarding schools or private governesses, like many other children in Hollywood. Their dad drove them to school. Walt was caring and eager to play with them, although he sometimes lost his temper and gave them a spanking. He protected the girls from the public eye; never took them to movie premieres, amusement park openings, or any other celebrations related to his growing empire of fantasy. What a paradox: the very man who spread childlike wonder across the world and helped to turn the relationships between grown and little people upside down, maintained imperturbable hierarchy in his own life.

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