Testing the Waters

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was asked to write a few words about himself and it blocked him. He clogged up like the import channels of the mitochondrial proteins, whose unblocking and biogenesis he studies. Out of curiosity and hunger.

Our reporter Tomasz Sitarz came across the transcript of an unusual talk show, featuring an interview with a very special guest: a particle of water. The starlet droplet not only put up with the host’s dry humour, but also flooded the audience with streams of knowledge about its very particular structure and properties. We encourage everyone to give it a read – after all, we’re all in the same boat.

Host: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome back to our studio. After the stormy dispute with Mr Cumulonimbus about the climate crisis, we dip our toes into a very different topic. Our next guest is a first-class celebrity. Present in every kind of environment, finding her way into the narrowest cracks of existence. She is the driving force of this spectacle we call life. Please welcome… Water!

Water: Good evening, thank you for having me.

In our programme, we try to enter the high seas of conversation, following a formula based on depth psychology. We want our guests to be able to describe how their personality developed from the earliest childhood memories, all the way to their fully-formed adult shape. Therefore, my first question is this: Where did you come from?

The answer to this question isn’t as simple as it may seem. Several theories examine the sources of my presence on Earth, and I’ll be happy to elaborate on them later, but as a particle, I consider my coming-to-existence a chemical process. As you may already know, I am made of two atoms of hydrogen, connected with one atom of oxygen. Therefore, my formula

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Tomasz Sitarz:

was asked to write a few words about himself and it blocked him. He clogged up like the import channels of the mitochondrial proteins, whose unblocking and biogenesis he studies. Out of curiosity and hunger.

Translation: Aga Zano

Publish date: 19.03.2021

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Renata Lis:

A writer and translator, whose works include “Lesbos” (a book about love and exile), and completely unique biographies of Flaubert and Bunin, for which she was nominated for awards (one of which she won). She can’t decide whether she’s a pine dreaming of being a palm, or the other way around, so she alternates her travels between Greece and Russia; she’s been as far as Kamchatka.

Mother Earth has provided us with natural ways to relax and heal our various ailments. All we need do is find some hot springs and hop in. Some people consider it sinful to indulge your body, but practice and science say otherwise.

We drove to Mutnowska Sopka in a massive, off-road bus with big wheels – one of those exotic vehicles that can only be found in the wilderness of Siberia and the Americas. We stood for a moment with our backpacks in the middle of the mountain wilderness – 120 kilometres from Petropavlovsk-Kamchatskiy, 800 metres above sea level, at the foot of one of the dozens of active Kamchatka volcanoes. It was warm, there was a smell of sulphur in the air. We could hear rhythmic hisses and whistles accompanying the sudden bursts of steam from the Earth’s interior. After a 30-minute walk, we found ourselves in a valley similar to the Valley of Geysers, but smaller and less well-known. We pitched our tents on the hot ground among stains of sulphur efflorescence, between the bubbling lakes and small geysers. We were near the relatively environmentally-friendly Mutnowska Geothermal Power Plant, built at the start of the 21st century. It was the most awesome place I’d ever stayed.

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Hot Springs Eternal

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